Official statistics show that 84 per cent of schoolchildren in Malaysia, under the age of 18, have suffered bullying in one form or another. — Photo from pexels.com
I LOOKED up the definition of the word ‘bullying’ and was informed of its meaning: “The use of force, coercion, hurtful teasing, comments, or threats, in order to abuse, aggressively dominate, or intimidate one or more others. The behaviour is often repeated and habitual.”
It continues to say: “Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behaviour among school-age children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance.
“The behaviour is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time. Both children who are bullied and who bully others may have serious lasting problems.”
In recent weeks, we have been bombarded in the mass media and on various social media platforms, the sharings of the hot topic of the moment: the death of a 13-year-old schoolgirl, Zara Qairina Mahathir, in Sabah.
On Aug 20, five teenagers were charged with bullying at the Kota Kinabalu Court for Children under Section 507C(1) of the Penal Code, read together with Section 35 of the same Code, for using abusive words against the victim.
All five pleaded not guilty.
If convicted, they could face up to one year’s imprisonment, a fine, or both.
The case made headlines when Zara Qairina was found unconscious in a drain near her school dormitory in Papar on July 16, and had died the following day at the Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Kota Kinabalu.
It then appeared that the standard operating procedure (SOP) for an investigation into her ‘sudden death’ was not followed, and had caused an uproar, which resulted in a public outcry and followed by public rallies calling for a ‘transparent investigation’.
Foul play was suspected.
Cases of bullying have become more common in recent times; hardly a week goes by without some news item mentioning occurrences of such similar nature throughout the length and breadth of Malaysia.
Often, such bullying tactics and incidents happened in institutions of learning, and also at the workplace.
According to the Malaysia Crime Prevention Foundation, bullying affects 84 per cent of children under the age of 18 in some way or form. Bullying takes many forms, including cyberbullying and in some cases, physical violence leading to severe injuries and even death.
In 2017, Malaysians were shocked by a series of bullying incidents that ended in the death of T. Nhaveen and navy cadet officer Zulfarhan Osman Zulkarnain at the hands of their peers.
Between 2012 and 2015, 14,000 bullying cases in schools were recorded in Malaysia by the Education Ministry (Unicef statement June 21, 2018)
In 2018 in commemoration of World Children’s Day in Malaysia, Unicef together with the Education Ministry launched a programme, ‘Kindness for Every Child’, to help support a victim, be a responsible bystander and to spread kindness every day.
Most bullying initiatives focus on punishing the bully, but in doing so, this only continues the cycle of violence.
We all want to counter bullying through kindness. Instead of punishing the bully, isn’t it time to reward the kind?
Perhaps it is high time that the ministry and the government take a long hard look at making radical changes in their current policies affecting bullying.
Denmark, together with Sweden and Finland, have one of the lowest rates of bullying in Europe.
Anti-bullying programmes were introduced in Danish schools in 2010.
Students learn from a young age to treat others as how they would like to be treated.
This is built into their school curriculum and inculcated from when they were very young.
Teachers and parents are seen as confidants and guidance-givers more than the authorities that they have to respect and answer to.
Yet, not all is as rosy and glossy as it’s made out to be.
Bullying still remains an issue and a particular problem for the 10- to 15-year-olds.
The chief executive officer Rasmus Kjeldahl of a children’s rights non-governmental organisation (NGO), which managed a call centre, said that they had seen the number of calls related to bullying increase, as well as suicidal thoughts, especially among young teenagers.
“The digital dimension has made it worse because the bullying doesn’t stop when you leave the school,” he added.
Cyberbullying is yet another dimension that has reared its ugly head.
It’s the latest in a grouping that highlights the four most common types of bullying: physical, verbal, relational and cyber-bullying. They range from the obvious and highly visible forms like punching or hitting, to more subtle and virtually invisible to everyone except its victim and participants.
How does one respond and shut down a bully?
Experts say there are seven ways:
- STOP IT! Warning given directly to the bully.
- Then ask the question, WHY?
- After this, try and spark some form of EMPATHY from the bully.
- Next, WARN him or her verbally that such behaviour is NOT OKAY, and neither is it socially acceptable.
- Tell the person that you want to TALK and seek to know the reason why.
- After this, ACKNOWLEDGE what the person is trying to achieve, which may lead to him opening up more.
- Finally offer HELP as to how to resolve the issue.
If you have a child and are concerned about whether or not he is being bullied, or God forbid, fear that he is the one bullying others, how can we help stop it?
It is very important to make sure the child knows everything about the issue.
Educate your child about bullying; talk openly and frequently, and help him to be a positive role model among his peers in school.
Be a role model for him yourself to start with; at the same time, help him build his self confidence in himself.
Finally, be a part of his online experience and always keep a watchful eye out for changes in moods, temperament and any personality changes.
The Penal Code is Malaysia’s primary criminal law, outlining offences and punishments.
Bullying comes under this ambit. The government recently amended this Penal Code (Amendment) Act 2025 (Act A1750), which received royal assent on Feb 25 this year, was gazetted on March 7, and came into effect on July 11.
The law now leaves no ambiguities.
It applies across all environments: schools, workplaces, cadet training camps, hospitals, and even cyberspace; ensuring protection for all in both physical and digital spaces.
No longer can excuses like these be used to explain away such bullying practices, occurrences and episodes.
For example, in the past one could have said:
- “It’s just office politics. A nasty and offensive culture, but common practice!”
- “Oh, just toughen up – we’ve all gone through this before during our orientation!”
- “That’s how things work around here. Buck up, or get lost!”
- “If you can’t handle this, you just don’t belong here!”
- “I can just post a nasty remark because I have a fake name!”
All the above have always been the different guises under which bullying has taken place since time immemorial.
Well, too bad – it’s now called breaking the law, and the Penal Code will be used to charge anyone accused of being a part of committing such incidents of verbal, written or physical abuse.
Bullying can be harmful to your mental health, one’s self-esteem and social relationships with others.
People who bully often have low self-esteem.
Students who are bullied are more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety, health issues, poor academic achievement, and behavioural problems in school.
A small number may also retaliate in violent ways.
If you are being bullied or you know someone who is being bullied, there are ways to stop it and places to go for advice, support and counselling.
If you know specifically of someone in grave danger for his or her life, due to his or her present circumstances and high potential for self-harm, you must take the matter seriously and seek immediate help from the authorities – meaning the police, or call 911 for emergency help.
To conclude, I’d like to share two favourite quotes on bullying from two notable heroes:
“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.” — Desmond Tutu.
“We explain when someone is cruel or acts like a bully, you do not stoop to their level. Our motto is when they go low, you go high.” — Michelle Obama.
May God help and bless all those who are being, or have been bullied, and have survived bullies, and to their bullies too.
* The opinions expressed in this article are the columnist’s own and do not reflect the view of the newspaper.
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